One day, in the greatest of Koreas, the one and only North, our supreme leader was having some financial difficulties. Having been pestered by the south for too long about what he does with his own hard earned Won, he figured he needed a covert place to store it.
Those pesky southerners had eyes on the banks, and claws in the printing presses. The only way our beloved Kim Jong Un could make this work was to deal in off shore banking.
But he who is beautiful and kind, is also clever. He knew he could not trust just any foreigner to deal in his precious Won. He could only trust a close friend, someone he had shared secrets with, someone who shared a love of…Basketball.
And so, the Gloriously Sexy Overlord began penning his letter to the homey Dennis Rodman. It reads as follows;
Dear Brown American Friend ,
I am in dire need of your expert aid. Please open your heart and bank account to me and my Won, old friend. It would mean much to my country. I need, just for a few moment, to put all of my many plentiful Won in your good solid bank. It is only for safety. Please be a good man and the hoop shooter that I have grown to love.
Sincerely,
Your Friend and Lover, Kimmy
Mr. Dennis, being the kind hearted comrade that he is, gave his aid to the good Leader.
Little did we know, the unbelievably tall man just went out and used the money to have shin reduction surgery.
Thus begun the Supreme leaders’ official plans to eviscerate the filth pig Americans with big nuclear bottle rockets.
FIN
Those pesky southerners had eyes on the banks, and claws in the printing presses. The only way our beloved Kim Jong Un could make this work was to deal in off shore banking.
But he who is beautiful and kind, is also clever. He knew he could not trust just any foreigner to deal in his precious Won. He could only trust a close friend, someone he had shared secrets with, someone who shared a love of…Basketball.
And so, the Gloriously Sexy Overlord began penning his letter to the homey Dennis Rodman. It reads as follows;
Dear Brown American Friend ,
I am in dire need of your expert aid. Please open your heart and bank account to me and my Won, old friend. It would mean much to my country. I need, just for a few moment, to put all of my many plentiful Won in your good solid bank. It is only for safety. Please be a good man and the hoop shooter that I have grown to love.
Sincerely,
Your Friend and Lover, Kimmy
Mr. Dennis, being the kind hearted comrade that he is, gave his aid to the good Leader.
Little did we know, the unbelievably tall man just went out and used the money to have shin reduction surgery.
Thus begun the Supreme leaders’ official plans to eviscerate the filth pig Americans with big nuclear bottle rockets.
FIN